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Having Fun Without Screen Time 😺
How to Support Healthy Development While Allowing Your Child to Have Fun
Learn how screen time affects your child’s development, and get tips on creating healthy digital habits for your family.
The Essential Question for Parents
When you’re thinking about introducing screens to your child, try starting with this gentle question: Am I looking for simplicity in this moment, or am I focused on a longer-term vision? This question can guide you with a surprising amount of clarity.
Handing over a tablet with games or cartoons while you’re making dinner feels like a quick, easy fix. Screens are incredibly engaging (we know this from our own experience as adults!). And yes, in that moment, it can feel like a relief. But, much like candy or other little treats that bring a quick burst of happiness, once screens are in the picture, your child may start comparing every other activity you suggest – like playing with toys while you finish the dishes – to the exciting allure of the tablet.
When you introduce screens, you’re opening the door for your child to weigh all kinds of wonderful experiences – drawing, playing, exploring outside, reading a favorite book, or simply watching a leaf drift by – against what’s on a screen. The question may begin to form in their minds, “Is this as fun as my iPad?”
We are here to explore
Every family’s journey with screens is unique, and each of us approaches it in our own way. Some parents find that setting clear boundaries from the very beginning – like allowing screens only on specific days or for set amounts of time – can create a healthy relationship with screens, one that prevents conflict and sets expectations.
It’s worth taking a little time to consider how you want screens to fit into your family’s life, especially before they become part of the daily routine or, perhaps, even before giving your child their own device. Here are some gentle reflections to consider:
- Do you hope your child will continue to cultivate a love for playing with toys, creating, building, climbing, and exploring? These experiences foster essential brain development, motor skills, and physical health. Or are you open to the possibility that these enriching activities might become a little less engaging next to the pull of a favorite game or Youtube video?
- Do you imagine your child finding joy in books, getting lost in stories, and letting their imagination soar? While many children can love both reading and using a tablet, it can be tricky to return to books if screens take center stage. Many parents of older children speak about the challenge of rekindling that love for reading.
- In places like restaurants, where waiting quietly can be challenging, screens can feel like a saving grace. But think of it this way: learning patience and table manners is a skill that takes practice – and each time you guide them through, you’re helping your child learn how to wait and engage respectfully with the people around them.
We learn and grow through conversation, connection, and shared experiences.
For Fun-Loving Little Ones
As parents, we all want to create a happy, fulfilling life for our children while setting boundaries that reflect our values and culture. If you’ve already decided to delay introducing screens to your child—especially those ever-accessible handheld devices—to avoid creating a digital dependency, you’re not alone. Let’s start by being clear: delaying screen introduction for children and limiting access to social media and games for teens isn’t about being anti-technology. Technology can be fantastic—when it’s not addictive. There are wonderful screen-free options, like Mighty, that allow kids of all ages to explore the freedom of choosing their own music from playlists you’ve made or listening to the stories you’ve thoughtfully selected on platforms like Spotify or Amazon Music. It’s one of the best tools we’ve found for parents who want to focus on the rich, real-world experiences that build a strong foundation before screens come into play.
The Power of Waiting
By waiting on screen introductions – by keeping tablets or phones from becoming a routine part of home, car rides, outings, and errands – you may find it easier for your child to continue to find great joy in play, creativity, movement, and even just being in the present. It also gives your child the chance to learn how to manage big feelings with you by their side, rather than reaching for a screen for comfort. This skill – knowing how to self-soothe and cope – will be a gift they carry with them throughout their lives.
It's a Grey Area
The conversation around children and screen time often starts on the wrong foot, as if it’s a simple debate of being for or against it. Like many important and complex topics related to healthy upbringing, it’s about having access to clear information and making well-informed decisions in every situation.
Join us in this line of thought by continuing to read the examples below.
What You Child Consumes on a Screen Matters
When you have the choice between letting your child watch something of higher quality versus content that’s fast-paced and purely for entertainment, the decision matters. Research shows that programs like Sesame Street can provide educational benefits, while shows like SpongeBob may contribute to shorter attention spans.
It’s crucial to have control over what your child consumes. Streaming services where you can select what they watch are much better tools than platforms like YouTube, where you can’t control the ads or suggested videos they might encounter.
The Type Of Screen Your Child Uses Matters
Tablets can be useful, but they’re also complicated. If you need to bring your child to an important doctor’s appointment and require an undisturbed conversation, allowing them to watch a favorite show on a tablet might make the meeting more manageable. In such cases, you’re prioritizing your own health—which is important for your child too—and using the screen as a tool in a specific situation. But outside of such exceptions that you for your own reasons decide on, there’s often no real need for children to use tablets or phones.
Screens are here to stay, but so are a lot of other things that adults can handle better than children.
How Screen Time Affects Your Child’s Development
- Cognitive Development (and later; Academic Performance)
Screen time on tablets and smartphones during early childhood has been linked to developmental delays in areas like language and problem-solving. - Social Skills and Emotional Development
When screen time replaces playtime, children miss out on learning the art of face-to-face connection and empathy. - Physical Health and Sedentary Lifestyle
Screen time often means sitting still, which can affect a child’s physical health and lead to a more sedentary lifestyle. - Vision Decline and Increased Need for Glasses
Extended screen time, especially up close, has been linked to higher rates of myopia (nearsightedness) in children, increasing the likelihood of needing glasses. - Attention and Focus
Quick-paced apps and games may make real-world tasks seem slow, challenging children’s ability to sustain attention. - Emotional Regulation and Dopamine Response
Games and videos can create a “feel-good” cycle that makes other activities seem less exciting, impacting emotional resilience. - Risk of Behavioral Issues
Certain fast-paced or intense content can affect young children’s behavior, sometimes making them more impulsive or irritable. - Sleep Disruptions
The blue light from screens can confuse our natural sleep rhythms, making it hard for kids to wind down at bedtime.
Screen Introduction Takeaways for Parents
It’s natural to wonder if we’re overthinking things. “Why should I approach screen time differently than so many other families? Am I just making life harder?”
But sometimes, by rethinking the role of screens, we open up new possibilities for our family’s growth and connection.
We all want what’s best for our children, and screens aren’t “good” or “bad”—they’re simply tools. It’s how we choose to use them that shapes their impact. If you’re curious to dive deeper, check out Dr. Becky’s thoughtful tips on questions to consider as you make the choice that feels right for you and your child.
